Morning Moments

[1 Tim 1:12] Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.

The Deacon's Responsibility for his Children.

Contrary to some of our modern ideas, it takes a man and a woman to manage a home. One of the reasons there is so much confusion and conflict in the lives of so many children is because of a lack of proper parenting. It is NOT to be the case with church leaders. Godly management is the key, and that involves discipline and direction of children.

Irresponsible ADULTS are to blame for what has happened to far too many children today. In the first place we created the term "adolescent" to give an excuse for misbehavior. "Oh", we say, "they are just being teenagers". When did we ever create this social vacuum called adolescence? When kids who had to work hard and were taugh that it builds character stopped required the same of their kids.

One of our sons attended high school and worked at Pizza hut at night. The other son attended high school and work at Taco bell after school. Our twin daughters picked peppers in the field when they were fourteen, waitressed when they were fifteen and all worked their way through college. We have NEVER had to bail one out financially. They are know how to manage money and people. They were not perfect, but neither were their parents, but that does not excuse responsibility.

I was recently in India and spent time in a "home for girls". Every one of those teenagers was a hard worker, rising early to prepare for the day and ALL were very respectful. I developed some physical problems and one of the teenage girls latched onto me and took care of me. She helped me walk, served me with such deep respect, and wrote me a sweet note when I left about how much she loved me and that I was like a grandfather to her and she assured me of her prayers and wished me well. It melted my heart.

When I taught high school, my students loved and respected me, not for how much I knew, but because my love for them was real even when I had to discipline them. Kids don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. Kids know! And they live what they learn. There must be a balance between love and discipline! We, as church leaders, must set the example of good parenting - not the world's way but God's way. Kids that were the biggest problems did not work. They had too much time on their hands and as mama use to say, "Idle hands are the devil's workshop".

In my early years, I became too involved with church and community. Having been elected to president of the Mental Health Association, chairman of the blood bank, president for the ministry to prisoners, and a dozen other positions of leadership, I one day realized that my social commitments were threading my parental responsibility. I change before it was too late and believe it saved my children from a grave danger. Let me explain.

When I was a boy, my dad was an extremely busy man. He was a politician and actively involved in our community. He was always going to a meeting of some kind. He was a great man, but not a good dad. He sought to make up for his absence by "giving things" to me. THAT DOES NOT SUBSTITUTE for your presence and participation in the life of your children. Next to being the right kind of husband, a man must be the right kind of dad, and that means so much more than the money we can make. Your time is your most precious commodity, and nothing will substitute for time with your kids - BOTH quantity and quality. Our society says that time is money, but the Bible teaches that time is mandatory for kids.

They must learn to work with us, walk with us, witness with us, worship with us, and watch us behave what we say we believe as Christian men. THAT, my friend, is managing your household well.

BLESSINGS!